This has definitely been the craziest week of summer….ever. Crazier than dance camp, choir trip. And any neshoba county fair. Yeah, that crazy. I hardly had a free minute to spare. I was in Brandon one minute, then work, then dogwood, then someones house, ect. It was just crazy. But I has to occupy myself since Jeffery was gone and all. I couldn’t just sit around, because I would go crazy. Just two more days, then he’ll be home :) humans vs Zombies ended due to lack of activeness, but I was human, therefore I won :) dance wasn’t as bad as I thought it would be; I still don’t like waking at for 6 AM practice though :/ oh well. So much happened this weekend. And this weekend was complete disaster, I won’t even go into that though. And now it’s bed time. Another week begins with tomorrow, hopefully this week is a lot better though
work sucked today, but Collin Wilbanks made it a little better. he always makes things better. i love him so very much, ahah. I played ultimate frisbee today and i kicked butt. i showed all them guys up! i’m glad that Michal McDaniel invited me :) Jeffery left today for 11 days….yeah, 11 days of pure hell. i have to find things to do like i did today or else i will go crazy. dance starts back on tuesday. 3 days a week, 6 to 8 in the morning. i’m not really looking forward to it. maybe i don’t like dance team as much as i thought i did. i don’t like practice, or half the team. idk, i’ll live through two more years i guess. another sucky challenge today for HvZ, i didn’t go to it though because i didn’t find out about it until after it happened. they are really bad about gettting the news out. anyway, i’m still human. bwahahah. goodnight.
So today, I found out that the new game of Humans VS Zombies is gonna begin….in June. But I’m still stoked. I’m gonna be ready this time though with my Nerf gun and socks to protect me. I will remain human; i have to…
In other news, Ms. Dearman signed my annual for the first and last time she ever will. I am really going to miss her next year regardless of what anyone else says. I’m proud of her in a way though for handling her divorce, moving on to Kal, and going back to school….like she really needs another degree or something? But, she is still an awesome person and I don’t know how I’m going to handle PSAT without her. I love her to death, and I still can’t believe she is leaving :( Also, while I was talking about my favorite play by Shakespeare, “The Taming of the Shrew”, Dearman informed me that the movie “10 Things I Hate About You” was based off of that Shakespeare play. It finally clicked as to why the play seemed so ungodly familiar to me. Now I know. And now I want to watch that movie.
Anyway, only about a week and a half left of school for me. Tomorrow, half of Thursday, then next week and I’m D.O.N.E. As much as I love school, i need a break. I need to go spunkling, compete for dance, have morning workouts all summer, go to the beach, worship God without anything else in mind, and do missions. I need a break. I need my 3 church trips. I need dance camp. I need Neshoba. For once in my life, I cannot wait to get out of school.
Btdubs, i am treasurer for Beta Club of 2011-2012. We vote on student council next week, I’m still awaiting annual staff results, and i was voted one of the captains of the dance team. I’m doing pretty good if I say so myself :) For dance, it’s the 3 seniors and me. Yeah, i feel pretty special! Haha. Anyway, i can’t wait for junior year. But I’m not gonna worry about that now.
Jeffery is gonna be gone for pretty much all of June. sucks…. I might have a nervous breakdown. And i know all that sounds cheesy and cliche. You’re only in high school. You don’t know what true love is. Blah blah blah, say what you want. But i love Jeffery and nothing has changed that yet. But i guess you never know. He’s the only person I want to be with though. Crazy how things work out like that. On the flip side, I’m gonna miss him next month. We will definitely be spending every second he is home together. Or else i might quite literally die… Hah. Jk. sorta. Anyway, our 7 months is this week. Crazy.
Well, over the past 40 days of lent season, i feel like i took 3 steps up and 3 steps back in my relationship with God. I don’t feel like I grew any closer like we, as Christians, are in titled to during Lent. That’s the whole point of it. I learned some really awesome things, but I just don’t feel closer. But that’s alright. I still have years to come and many lent seasons to experience. Anyway, many things happened over the past weeks. I began driving; me and Jeffery had our big 6th month-a-versary!; I got a job; and I went to prom.
April 6th was the special day of my legallity on the roads, officially, by myself, between the hours of 6 AM and 10 PM. yeah, doesn’t seem that exciting. But trust me, it so is. I love driving, and love that i am actually on time to things such as school and other events, and I don’t have to wait on someone to pick me up, and I can go where ever I want to within reason! I just can’t wait for October 6th now: full license :)
April 5th was my 6th months celebration with Jefferson. We didn’t exchange gifts, we think that’s kinda overrated and we can’t just be throwing around money. Plus, each other’s presence is a gift in itself! We went to eat at Biaggi’s. Go there, it’s fricken awesome: new fav restaurant. Then we hung out basically all weekend, with an exception of our work schedules. And ever since that weekend, we have tried our hardest to see each other a lot more. Since school is almost out, we mostly just have tests to take but not as much homework and extracurricular activities. Therefore, aside from work, we have a lot more free time then we used to. Also, since I can drive now, it’s a lot easier to hang out. Overall, these past 6th months have been absolutely wonderful and I can’t wait to celebrate more and more Month-A-Versaries with Jeffery :)
The day i started driving, I went and applied at Pump It Up! and thanks to my loving boyfriend, I got the job. It’s not as easy as it seems to be a party coordinator, but I enjoy it for the most part. I also just got my first paycheck. And might i say, i was definitely content with it :)
And lastly, Prom. NWR Prom 2011 to be exact. April 16th, and for sure one of the best nights this year yet. Even though we had to wait and hour and a half at Logan’s before we got to eat, it was such a wonderful evening. I danced around to Pretty Girl Rock and Drop It Low in my Toms and met some pretty cool people as well as saw some good friends of mine. We left a little early to go party at Pump It Up! Most people would hate to go party where they work, but not all of my group. We love to go play around in the arenas! And although Jeffery got bowed in the face, stomped in the balls, and almost fought one of his best friends, it was still a great evening. I can’t wait for next year <3
Is when you two can act like lovers and best friends. It’s when you have more playful moments than serious moments. It’s when you can joke around, let each other have piggy backs, have unexpected hugs and random kisses. It’s when you two give each other that specific stare and just smile. It’s when you’ll rather chill inside to watch movies, eat junk food and cuddle than go out all the time. It’s when you’ll stay up all night just to settle your arguments and problems. It’s when you can completely act yourself and they can still love you for who you are.
I cleaned and rearranged my room more than I normally do.
I have not procrastinated and actually been getting to bed earlier than normal.
I realized I was finally over you.
Snow day, which was actually ice day.
Met tons of new people :)
I rarely got to see Jeffery, but God got us through it
I lost a friend, but reunited with him tonight.
Dance practice left me with an overall of about 11 bruises, turf toe, a bruised bicep, and a screwed up arm. Disney World better be worth it.
I gained back all that weight that I lost after giving up soft drinks.
Had an emotional breakdown.
Overall, this month was very good despite not seeing Jeffery as often as I wanted to. That was about the only real big stress, besides dance, I had on my shoulders this past month. But, with God, we got through it one little love fight at a time. :) I look forward to what this month brings me.
I used to have a big problem with fitting in. I was always the person who knew everyone but didnt fit right in any of the groups. I would awkwardly walk from group to group in the courtyard before school. I also would hang out with just one person, not a group.
But now, I have realized that I don’t need to fit in anywhere. I have the best friends I could ask for, and that’s all I need.
Honestly, I am very open to different kinds of guys. I have been attracted to many different types of guys: rednecks, older guys, intelligent guys, skaters, army kids, ect. Currently, my most attraction, for my boyfriend of course, is for focused, intelligent, lame, spiritual, goal-oriented young men. :)
Day 25 - Someone who fascinates you and why. (Intended for 1/27/11)
Taylor Swift fascinates me about how she can sing 7162347 songs all about different guys and NO ONE has figured out that she is obviously a big hoe bag. Really? And she is a bad friend since she wrote a song telling the world that her friend had sex at 15. I would be highly upset if I was Abigail.
Day 22 - How have you changed in the past 2 years? (Intended for 1/24/11)
Wow. That’s a long tme, and i have changed drastically since then.
2 years ago, was second semester of 8th grade. I was kinda pessimistic back then, which I try not to be and usually am not now a days. I also took a lot for granted, such as school and friends. I also wasn’t that close to God. I was making some wrong decisions and accumilating bad habits. But today, I am pretty spiritual in my opinion and based my decision-making off of my beliefs in Christianity.
I was also depressed 2 years ago. It was 8th grade and I have serious problems. But they made me very strong in the long run and now I am one of the most confident people that I know.
I also try ten times harder in school and I don’t stress myself out like I used to. In middle school, i would procrastinate and get really stressed out instead of just doing my work and not complaining. It made me not have as good of grades as I do now, which I get by just doing homework and projects on time and not stressing about it, but doing the best I can.
For the bad, i have developed insomnia within the past 2 years. Sadly. I wish I could get more sleep, because it bothers me to know I may struggle with this sleep problem for many years to come and it could ultimately shorten my life span. BOO!
Overall, I believe I have changed for the better. No, i’m not perfect. But at least I’m trying, and I think that’s what really counts :)
Well, this is just an update of what’s going on in my life right now…for anyone who cares.
Anyway, i am currently doing great in school; go figure. But i am dancing 5 days a week, twice on mondays too. It’s hell. I have at least 7 bruises from this past week of dance, turf toe, and a bruised tricep. BOO! But dance team goes to nationals in less than two weeks, then this will all be over. THANK GOD!
January has been the worst month this year, and it’s only the first month of the year. Wtf? I have been constantly back and forth with school, church, and dance and still having to keep up with a relationship with Jeffery and God. Jeffery has definitely been set on the back burner, and it’s absolutely killing me. I love him so much, yet I see him maybe 3 times a week. I’m not gonna lie, it fricken sucks. He is constantly working, or has a banquet, or his mom is being a wanch, or he is out of town. On that note, he has gone out of town the past three weekends. FML. Just two more weeks of January; I sure hope I can make it… Because this is gettting to me, bad. And there is nothing I can do about it. It finally hit me hard yesterday. It just sucks bad, because we haven’t been on a date in a month, and whenever we do hang out it’s for like an hour or less. Ugh, i don’t know. I’m rambling.
Overall, my life right now is just blah. I’m always tired and I have definitely been irritable. So if I snap on you, I apologize. I wouldn’t say I’m stressed, just ready for everything this month to be over and for me to just have some fun in my filled weekends of February.
For next month, I have nationals February 4-8, then I get to miss school on the 9th. So personal holiday. Then, I have the ACT and the school 80s dance on the weekend of the 12th. THEN, I have the military ball with Jeffery on the 19th :) Then, I DNow at my church the weekend of the 25th-27th. Busy weekends, but all fun. It will definitely be a much much better month than January has been.
Personally, I think without an education, you’re screwed. Granted, some people can make something of their life without it, but that’s some. I absolutely love school, because I know I’m lucky enough to even be able to go to school to get an education. Therefore, besides family, friends, and God, education is a main priority in life. Because without it, you pretty much have no future. So don’t get pregnant and drop out, don’t drop out to go get married, don’t drop out because it’s too hard or stupid. Because dropping out will be the biggest mistake of your life. Point blank. I think you understand how important I think education is. The end.
Who doesn’t disrespect their parents at one point in time? I probably do it 5 out of the 7 days of the week. In our culture, we see it as being no big deal. I do though. I try not to, but it’s very difficult to not. It’s so easy to do it, and it’s definitely a bad habit. When I was about 13 and 14, me and my mother would bicker a lot about little things like chores, dance, school and I would always tell her to just cut me some slack because I’m just a teenager. She never liked that response, and I knew it. But it didn’t stop me from saying it: disrespect. Me and my maudre are really close now, even though I’m not even 16 yet, I don’t give her that stupid excuse that I’m just a kid so I can be lazy. No, it’s completely reputable. I realized that too, thankfully. We still get in fustles from time to time, as well as I do with my father, but that’s life. We’re not perfect and I am just a kid learning. But disrespecting your parentals every single day because you think something they do is stupid or you just don’t like it or they can’t do it because they are a parent gives you no right to just flat out disrespect them (same goes for other elders like teachers, police, ect.). They were a teenager once too, and you will probably be in their same boat one day too. So be nice to your parents, enjoy while you can. Because they could be gone in an instant, just like you can too. Plus, they brought you into this world; they can take you out too.
Wow, a very broad topic. Basically, I believe gayness is wrong, abortion is wrong, Obama doesn’t lead this country because God does, education is important, determination and ambition can get you anywhere, being nice to everyone will pay off, smelling the roses every now and then will keep you sane, pickles are the greatest invention, a sport you are passionate about will be the most stressful thing in your life, i am no better than anyone else, but that i am not the judge of what or who i do or do not deserve, giving up soda will help you lose weight, eating disorders are ridiculous, Christmas is about Christ and how He is the best gift we have ever been given, God will solve all your problems in time, God doesn’t give you anything He knows you can’t handle, sleeping is probably a good thing, being organized will keep your life on track, OCD is a serious condition that a lot of people struggle with like myself, we should respect our elders and teachers no matter what they do or who they are, killing with kindness is the worst murder, reading eases the mind, trying new things relieves stress, sex outside of marraige (adultry) is completely and irrevocably wrong, i can do anything I set my mind to, and you should love everyone no matter what. My beliefs, in a nut shell :)
Day 16 - Your views on mainstream music. (Intended for 1/18/11)
Well, personally. I don’t listen to a lot of mainstream music. I like to stick to my uncommon music such as punk, indie, electronic, techno, ect. One reason, i really don’t like to conform that much. Two, rap and a lot of pop culture is very threatening to the society today and harming our world by filling it with music about sex, girls, drugs, and money. Wtf? Three, I just partically enjoy listening to “my” kind of music. I enjoy hearing new things and I am always open to trying out new bands, music, and genre. Overall, i would much rather listen to a jammin’ mix cd I made than Y101.
Day 14 - Your earliest memory. (Intended for 1/16/11)
The earliest memory i can remember is when I was two and my family all went to disney world. I was sitting on my dad’s shoulders, we had just walked in, and I felt like I was in a movie. I looked around and saw all the magnificent things surrounding me. Then, it was over. That’s the only thing I remember.
Day 10 - Discuss your first love and first kiss (Intended for 1/12/10)
Wow. My first love. Well, i thought I loved Christian Hall (redneck one), but i was in like 7th grade. and I didn’t. Then, i thought i loved Darrock Flynn. But now that we are completely over, I have no feelings for him whatsoever. And if i loved him, i would still have something for him, anything. Plus, if i questioned it, then I never really loved him completely anyway. But now. I think I got it right. Judge me all you want, but I honestly think I love Jeffery. Yeah, we have only been dating for 3 and half months. Big deal. He is the most incredible guy that I have ever met, someone I could see myself with in the future. I have no question about him. He is just absolutely amazing, and I tell him that every day. I am the luckiest girl in the whole wide world, and I’m not afraid to say it. I love him. point blank :)
Now, first kiss is a little diffferent story. I was like 8, playing “house” with my neighbors. I was the mom, John Mozingo was the dad. He “came home” and kissed me right smack on the lips! Haha! If you don’t count that, then I would say probably Michael Beckham or Jeremy Brandon. I don’t remember that far back. I was a kissing whore when I was younger too, i regret it, but I was never raised to not kiss till that special person came along. So i just flaunted my lips around like no body’s business. Anyway, that’s it.
Well, I don’t really plan out my life. I just kinda make good grades and good decisions, and then go with the flow. yeah, i hope my life is good. I hope I graduate, get a job, get married, and have babies. End of story :)